Amber and Audra's Adventures

Amber got me into this, and right now, this/these are all I really have to share with you. ML and Eva aren't ready to see your eyes yet. My apologies, but tis the truth. I'd rather you read some really good writing from me and then stick me on your favorite authors list on Facebook. ;)

Anticipation, exclamation, all these things run through me, the pain and sorrow, the wide ruled rain, the stately marches that I see, they captivate me and I state in wide eyed wonder "Oh, the beauty of it all." Yellow, and grey, the flame reaches taller, taller, then shrinks back again and a trumpet blows. The white speaker turns the diamond gleams ever brighter, as I run faster, ever faster, plaid and green, trumpets, and violins, a gold insignia, crescendoing, crescendoing, all running together, slurred, faster, faster still, 1232 in October, I look at the folder, expecting something to happen, but nothing does; the pink, the green, the holly the ivy, my mind is infiltrated, weakening, stopping, shortening, giving in, not quite sure what to do. I feel surrounded, totally entrapped, there's no way to get out and no going back. There's no rewind where I can start over, no fast forward to get this done with; I have to persevere on as they close in, slowly now, watching me carefully, wondering what my next move will be; so many things run through my head, things I should edit, things I should do, what I should say, I don't know anymore what I should be doing. One day, maybe I'll figure it out, but spur of the moment isn't always the best time to try to figure that out. The horn section begins to play, and I wonder, "What silliness is this?" Then all goes quiet. Influences, influences, so many, yet so many I can't choose, too many that would take me down the wrong path, lead me the wrong way, and leave me a sorry, helpless, sickening human being. The cold, the numb, they wear at me, slowly forcing me to succumb, as my thoughts race to and fro, tyring to retain some form of sanity, even if it's just a small dot. I can't hold up too much longer, but I have to make it. I can, I will. I won't back down. I lay back and sleep, calming down, as dreams of dancers and ballet music, candles and notebooks, a ticking timer, all dance before me, seeming to confuse me while they calm me, bewilder me. The likeness of The Great Stone Face will not be found here, for one speaks words that he's never felt, while another yearns for the likeness to be found, just one. So many times we've been let down, crowning those undeserving of it, he the only sensible one among us. The jolt awakens me and I find myself ever confused, ever weakening, ever holding back, ever trying not to give in, ever hoping for some reprieve, ever hoping for the time this will end, when the candle will die, the flame still alive, as I sit here waiting, waiting, waiting, watching.

-Audra